I came across an article titled “How To Deal: Other People’s Happiness” on a site called Everyone Gets Divorced. While this is a humorous, tongue-in-cheek look at how everyone appears to be getting engaged, married and blissfully happy while your world is changing and/or crumbling around you, it really resonated with me.
I found that once I changed my name on Facebook and deleted my relationship status entirely (to eventually be replaced by “divorced”), I seemed to be inundated with friends that were celebrating their love and happiness. As if that wasn’t bad enough, every spammy ad on every internet site I visited was for engagement rings. I hated them all. I hated everyone.
Okay, so maybe I didn’t hate everyone but I did hate those stupid engagement ring ads.
A family member got married several months after Number 2 and I split and while I didn’t attend the out of town wedding, I couldn’t help but have the pessimistic parade flowing freely through my mind; i.e., “Hope she knows what she’s getting into,” “Hope she doesn’t change her name anytime soon,” “Yeah, it’s all fun and games the first few months!” etc.
Let’s be honest. When you are dealing with the most difficult emotional time you may ever deal with in life, it’s pretty damn hard to be roses and sunshine to people who are celebrating the most wonderful emotional time in theirs. I’m sure I was an annoying ray of sunshine when Number 2 and I were first engaged and getting married. I’m sure if I could go back in time to that person right now, I would kick the shit out of her. So how do we manage to be happy for others without putting ourselves into a further funk?